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Up Topic Communities / Women / Frantic Friday (RR and NRR)
- - By noquitter [us] Date 2017-11-24 7:53 AM
Not for me though I might head out for a little while just to people watch and hang with DD.
Parent - - By noquitter [us] Date 2017-11-24 7:53 AM
RR
Parent - - By noquitter [us] Date 2017-11-24 7:57 AM Edited 2017-11-24 7:59 AM
4.4 on the mill. It's really not so bad when you get used to it. I listen to music and alternate faster and slower segments. DD wanted todo a little shopping and people watching so I wanted to get the run out of the way. I did sleep in until 6.:shocker!:DH and I are heading to ST Louis to watch a hockey game later today so this would be a good chance for she and I to spend time together.
Parent - By judyruns Date 2017-11-24 8:20 AM
DD time. :hug: Great work on the 4.4 miler. TMs are necessary sometimes. Have a great time!
Parent - - By Nomad Date 2017-11-24 12:00 PM
It's really not so bad when you get used to it

I'm not sure you meant it that way, but I read it in the voice that screams "it's horrible but I'm pretending it's OK in the hope eventually it really will be OK" : pbbt:
Parent - By noquitter [us] Date 2017-11-24 12:36 PM
I see the treadmill as one of 3 options. In the winter the only option that's really  ok is a unseasonably warm sunny day with pleasant company. Unfortunately the usual choices  are  running on an indoor track at 5 am, running in the dark and cold or (if I'm lucky just cold) and running on TM. All are kind of :meh:
Parent - - By Arimathea [us] Date 2017-11-24 2:44 PM
TM is definitely not preferable to outside for most people, but it's better than not running.
Parent - By Buggy [us] Date 2017-11-24 9:32 PM
I beg to differ : pbbt:

That's what cross training is for!
Parent - - By noquitter [us] Date 2017-11-25 8:04 AM
Quit with the  TM bashing.:cry:
Parent - By Buggy [us] Date 2017-11-25 11:24 AM
:laugh::hug:
Parent - - By Arimathea [us] Date 2017-11-25 5:24 PM
I don't bash TMs. Not unless the machine pulls something really annoying like resetting to zero five minutes before my workout is scheduled to end without my being able to whip the book off fast enough to see what my mileage was. Then I do tend to bash the TM. With the book. : pbbt:
Parent - By judyruns Date 2017-11-29 7:34 AM
:laugh:
Parent - - By judyruns Date 2017-11-24 8:23 AM
Thursday I went to the park and did a good solid 35 minute run. I’m trying to baby the knee a little. It’s working. I wear capris so I can shove up the right leg pant to accommodate the knee strap. The cold hasn’t bothered the leg area exposed at all. Sometimes I add some lotion. That helps insulate like Vaseline on the face.
Today I’m planning a run down in the park. Waiting for temp to rise a little more. : pbbt:
Safe and happy runs, All! :hug:
Parent - By noquitter [us] Date 2017-11-24 8:48 AM
Weired suggestion but maybe track pants over the capris when it gets colder?
Parent - - By Arimathea [us] Date 2017-11-24 2:45 PM
I can't imagine smearing Vaseline on my face, but if it helps you, more power to you.
Parent - By judyruns Date 2017-11-24 8:53 PM
I do spots with very light layer of vaseline: around the eyes, spots on cheeks, nose, around mouth mostly. It keeps the face warm when you're in wind. I do NOT slather it. :laugh:
Parent - - By Nomad Date 2017-11-24 10:08 AM
Exercise/Rehab related: pilates class last night & physio this morning. There were a couple of things I couldn't do in pilates, but this is a "normal" class rather than rehab so that's not a big surprise, and both I had to stop due to nerve issues (I should push through if it's muscle but nerves can't be stretched & get really pissy when you upset them so I back off immediately). Physio was great - this new physio does fascial release so it's mostly her using hands to apply pressure and then some movement. It's clear that my hip flexors and calves need a LOT of work.

But, since Tuesday I think I can confidently say the flare up is dying back again. I'm still not where I was a few weeks ago, but then we know cold is a problem and it wasn't this cold a few weeks ago so that's a part of it. Of course it's been much warmer since Tuesday anyway so the real test will be when I head north on Sunday and we see if I'm still doing better in -25 :meh:

I also have a naturopath appointment tonight to see what he can do with my hashimoto's and apparent food intolerances (putting on 5lbs overnight is not a fat problem!)
Parent - By noquitter [us] Date 2017-11-24 12:37 PM
I hope you are making progress.
Parent - By Arimathea [us] Date 2017-11-24 2:43 PM
Agreed on the stopping. Muscles can be encouraged to work through some discomfort, nerves and joints can't. Glad the flareup seems to be dying back.
Parent - By classicsnerd [us] Date 2017-11-24 4:11 PM
Feeling like a runner again today! I just got back from my best run in months - 5.1 miles in 44:15 and I felt great! I remember why I like running now :laugh: after several months of mainly feeling blah when I run, and feeling generally sluggish and out of shape, this felt grand. Must have been all of the pie :laugh: yesterday I didn't make it to the turkey trot since I was feverishly preparing for dinner at 1.  The timing worked out perfectly. I did get in a quick 3 on the TM before the guests arrived, and we did a 3 mile walk between turkey and pie.  The food was delicious and we had a lovely Friendsgiving in our new home. I told DH there is no way Im cooking tonight so we're getting takeout :laugh:
Parent - - By noquitter [us] Date 2017-11-24 7:53 AM
NRR
Parent - - By moonglow9 Date 2017-11-24 8:48 AM
Still trying to make it through. My mum is at work today, and I'm working but at home (teleworking during the medical recovery). My father is home and off work. Not happy about this situation.  Yesterday had a relatively mid-sized blowup, this morning already had another one before mum had to leave for work.
I'd rather be alone.
Parent - By swandive Date 2017-11-24 9:09 AM
I'm sorry you are having such a rough time with your dad. :hug:
Parent - By SRoo Date 2017-11-24 9:44 AM
:sad:  I hope things improve.
Parent - By judyruns Date 2017-11-24 9:56 AM
A counselor once told me that holidays are crisis days. It is a hard, not joyful time sometimes.
I am sending you positive change vibes. :hug::hug: ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
Parent - By classicsnerd [us] Date 2017-11-24 10:41 AM
I'm so sorry to hear how tense this time is for you. :sad: :hug:
Parent - By tritri Date 2017-11-24 11:28 AM
:sad::hug:  Oh, honey.
Parent - By Nomad Date 2017-11-24 11:57 AM
:sad::hug:
Parent - By moonglow9 Date 2017-11-24 1:28 PM
Thanks to everyone for the hugs. It's been like this all my life with my parents' dynamic... so I can't say I'm terribly surprised. Still just trying to keep my own head clear from it all and get through. Unfortunately as I'm recovering here, I'm at least physically stuck here....
Parent - - By Arimathea [us] Date 2017-11-24 2:31 PM
Sorry the situation is so tense. You have to stay with them because of the medical issues?
Parent - - By moonglow9 Date 2017-11-24 4:47 PM
Yes - still recovering from the surgeries and other treatments throughout the summer and autumn. There are still flares that make it not advisable for me to be alone for extended time, plus I still have medical appointments several times a week. Hoping that next month I'll get cleared and can be back to on my own in January.
Parent - - By swandive Date 2017-11-24 5:49 PM
That's really rough. :sad: I imagine the psychological stress (even if it's "familiar") makes the physical recovery more difficult.  And it likely makes you feel as if you have to sacrifice your psychological well-being because, right now, your physical well-being takes precedence. :sad:
Parent - - By moonglow9 Date 2017-11-25 6:21 AM
Yes, exactly. I can't let down my guard or really be comfortable, but I have no choice because of the physical piece. He's always been like this, but it's getting worse and worse in frequency and uncalled-for-ness. And it impacts my mum more and more directly as a result - and the atmosphere impacts me both indirectly and (less frequently) directly too. :meh:
No clear solution....
Parent - By ironjen Date 2017-11-27 12:47 PM
:sad::hug:
Parent - - By Arimathea [us] Date 2017-11-27 6:12 PM
No need to respond to this if you don't want to, but if your dad's behavior and actions are becoming harder for you and your mum to live with, I would advise that your dad have a thorough checkup. Men are really bad about going to the doctor. I am concerned that your dad may have a condition that needs attention, and he may not be recognizing it (or not want to admit it) but it does sound as if you and your mum are being badly affected by your dad's words and actions. Unfortunately I do have some personal experience with this.
Parent - - By moonglow9 Date 2017-11-28 8:36 AM
Thanks Tessa - a good reminder. He's been thoroughly checked each year, last about 2 months ago. No problems, all tests, including speciality ones, came back as optimal health (He's almost 81 years old). He is actually fine about going for physicals, special checkups, etc. - I think because he trusts his GP and specialists, and actually finds them nice people. I hope that he at least keeps getting checked regularly.

Unfortunately, thinking back, he has always been this way. It was more masked before, or interspersed with times of decency, but now it is just the default. Too often he speaks only as a veiled way to belittle my mum (or me), or twist something we say into an entirely uncalled for interpretation that he thinks gives him license to erupt. Very volatile, but at the same time much subtle 'knife twisting' in the back. Little to no respect or basic human politeness comes through...(to non-family, it is a different story...)

I think because he wasn't called out for this earlier, he thinks it is fine and that he is not doing anything at all unacceptable. My mum doesn't want explosions for her own mental sanity, but letting him keep at it is not helpful for her either. :meh:
Parent - - By skigirl Date 2017-11-28 10:08 AM
:hug::hug::hug:

> I think because he wasn't called out for this earlier, he thinks it is fine and that he is not doing anything at all unacceptable.


I am seeing this same dynamic a lot in the people in my life who are in their 70s and 80s now. I remember reading once that as you get older, you don't really change so much as you become more of what you already were, if that makes sense, and I believe it, based on watching that generation age.
Parent - By moonglow9 Date 2017-11-28 10:50 AM
I remember reading once that as you get older, you don't really change so much as you become more of what you already were

Yes, this is what I mean. You say it so well, much better than I did! And here, those unacceptable actions/words are becoming all the more harmful, they seem to be honed over time in a way, becoming more of at what the seedlings from years ago were hinting.
Parent - - By Arimathea [us] Date 2017-11-28 11:43 AM
I'm glad he's seeing the doctor regularly. I'd also agree with skigirl -- many people become more set in their ways as they grow older and feel they should be able to say and do what they want, with less concern for how their words and actions affect others. It's the f.o. fairy carried to an extreme. And it's unfortunately often hurtful and frustrating for family members who usually bear the brunt of this mindset.

I wish I could say I didn't have firsthand experience with this -- but I do. Good luck to you and your mum. Sometimes standing up to the person is helpful (I'm still a bit ashamed of the time I threw the eggs at DH...but not that ashamed!), sometimes not reacting in any way and NOT giving in to what he wants or demands is a better course of action.
Parent - - By moonglow9 Date 2017-11-28 11:56 AM
The hard part is that it is clearly a conscious choice to belittle, find ways to make my mum or me seem small perhaps to improve his own view of himself. He's also started looking for things to fault, even small things such as leaving a light on become points for attack. Beyond just doing what he wants without thought to the consequence, there are the demeaning words/actions of one's ability/efforts/work/thoughts/speech, that seem entirely unnecessary.

Interesting about sometimes confronting being useful, sometimes no reaction and no acquiescence being better... something to think about.
Parent - - By Arimathea [us] Date 2017-11-28 12:27 PM
Yes. And there's a difference between "don't leave the light on!" and "you are so stupid and thoughtless because you left the light on, do you not even know how to operate a light switch?"

I'm sorry for you because it is so hard to see someone you love become this way.
Parent - By moonglow9 Date 2017-11-28 12:49 PM
Precisely this.

And the sad(?) part is that I am realising he always was this way, it is just more overt now. To be living with a person like this (and to know my mum is) shows me that he has never been appropriate in his interactions with us. It's the move from passive-aggressiveness and subtle digs to an added component of overt belittling and volatility. Neither preferable in a living situation, but not sure how to manage it, or which approach would be less likely to cause a worse backlash. Sigh.

I'm glad for the daytime of being back to alone at home working, now that everyone is back to work.
Parent - - By Mickey [us] Date 2017-11-28 12:52 PM
The engineer in me feels compelled to point out that some lightbulbs (fluorescent, in particular) are designed to be left on for long periods & cycling the power repeatedly actually reduces the working life of the bulbs - they fail quicker because they are not meant for "cycles", they are meant for "on once per day, off once at night".

This is directly in contrast to incandescent lights which have (virtually) no cycle limit, but instead have an "operational hours" limit on the filament, which means the incandescent lights should be shut off when not in use, without harm to the bulb.
Parent - By moonglow9 Date 2017-11-28 1:08 PM
:laugh::laugh:
Parent - - By Arimathea [us] Date 2017-11-28 10:35 PM
Good point. And a lot of lights in houses, especially in bathrooms, are fluorescent and do get turned on and off a lot.

How about LED lights?
Parent - By Mickey [us] Date 2017-11-29 8:02 AM
I have limited experience with the LED bulbs available commercially. Unfortunately, some LED lights have an annoying high-frequency buzz related to the power circuit (LED runs on DC power, like a battery, while your wall has AC power that needs to be converted). I can hear this & it aggravates my migraines, so I avoid those bulbs if I can. 

anecdotal report - a 2 foot Fluorescent bulb with an auto-switch when the pantry door opens would fail every 6 months,  replacing it with a comparable 2 foot LED alternate had at least a year of life before we moved out of that house.

My office replaced all the overheads with LED bulbs & now we have weird buzzing and blue stripey patterns everywhere (caused by the light waves combining into interference patterns) that most people don't ever notice.
Parent - By runningteach [us] Date 2017-11-24 4:30 PM
:sad:
Parent - - By tritri Date 2017-11-24 11:34 AM
Yesterday was a nice day. To add to dog park and dinner out, we had a nice bike ride around the lake together.  Then in the evening we played air hockey and then went for a walk in the woods in the dark. It was along a route we used to run through, and we were surprised to see a huge sink hole with all the trees laying down into it. Then we heard a bunch off coyotes yipping very excited! 
Parent - - By Arimathea [us] Date 2017-11-24 2:31 PM
Sink hole got all the coyotes excited? What in the world caused it?
Parent - By tritri Date 2017-11-24 3:37 PM
I don't know what caused the sink hole.  I was pretty surprised to see it there.  We saw a few coyotes on the drive in.   They get excited like that when they are successful with their hunting.
- - By Arimathea [us] Date 2017-11-24 2:30 PM
3.5 yesterday morning followed by marathon cooking, DSBF had to work at 5 PM so we ate at 3. Lots of good food, good company, it was a nice Thanksgiving except for the weather. We are having a heat wave here and temperatures were in the 90s, not the best environment when the oven's on all day. I can't remember the last time we had Thanksgiving inside because it was too hot and we wanted to stay in the AC. It's supposed to get a bit cooler each day until Monday. Where is winter? The only saving grace is that it's not windy.

Went out this morning for 10 before it got too hot. Good run, not too trafficky, except for one instance where I was plodding up a long hill, saw a plastic bag caught in the bushes on the opposite side of the bike path, stepped towards it, and provoked a yell from a biker who was speeding down the hill. OK, it was partly my fault for not looking, but he was going very fast. No collision which was good.
Parent - - By tritri Date 2017-11-24 8:24 PM
Wow!  That is hot for Thanksgiving!  In Phoenix, we always ate outside.   Good thing the cyclist f=didn't hit you!!
Parent - By Arimathea [us] Date 2017-11-24 9:26 PM
I agree, it is way too hot. I don't mind having Thanksgiving dinner on the patio, but I don't like it when it's too hot to be outside.

Wasn't really the cyclist's fault, I crossed the path, though he should slow down on the bike path even when he's going downhill.
Up Topic Communities / Women / Frantic Friday (RR and NRR)

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