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Up Topic Communities / Women / Getting Freaky on Friday -- the Sex thread
- - By Bunny Date 2006-07-07 6:37 AM
I've had a long lonely week (actually 9 days, but who's counting) anyone got ideas for this weekend?
Parent - By nhwarrior [us] Date 2006-07-07 6:46 AM
Aren't your parents leaving tomorrow am? You should be planning to spend the rest of the day (weekend) in bed... Get some food in the house so you don't have to go anywhere and see what happens :evil:
Parent - - By Bunny Date 2006-07-07 11:30 AM
Committed ladies, I need help

Checking some race results I discovered that an old flame is now an impressive tri-athlete and runner (23:26 5K at 33). Our time together consisted of some fairly crazy stuff like sex parties and threesomes. Now I'm thinking of the threesome thing and how much I liked it. Yet, I don't know if I'm willing to expose my very happy relationship to that kind of stress/possible damage. (Assuming DH would go for it.)

So what do ya'll do when there's something you want that DH won't do? Is there some Zen technique I need to master? Honestly this has never come up before in our relationship.
Parent - By littlemary [us] Date 2006-07-07 11:34 AM
i cant offer any advice honestly, i dont think there is a thing i could mention that wouldnt get a resounding yes.:laugh::cry::evil:
Parent - - By Arimathea [us] Date 2006-07-07 11:40 AM
Do it by yourself and fantasise.  That's about the only harmless way to do something that DH can't/won't.

Honestly, that's not a step that can be reversed or forgotten.  Ever.  There are some things that were fun when we were younger and probably would be enjoyable again -- but could cause such pain to others that they're best left as memories.

I can think of few things more hurtful to any man's ego than "Sweetie, I love you, but I want another guy as well".  They are hard wired to be your sole partner.  It goes way back to the worry that he's bringing food back to the cave to feed some other male's progeny.  There's a reason so many children are killed by their mothers' new boyfriends -- not a conscious reason, but a reason nevertheless.

We're getting way too deep here for a thread that usually associates "deep" with penetration -- but truly, I think if there's something you want that your DH won't/CAN'T do, you need to weigh the momentary pleasure against the possible lifetime ramifications.  Obviously he can't make love to you using two bodies, can you employ toys to simulate the sensations?
Parent - - By Bunny Date 2006-07-07 11:52 AM
What a minute!!! what are you doing here during the day?

Your right toys or fantasy is the way to go. I suppose he'll never think of it the way I do no matter how I word the suggestion. What's worse is that I would be totally unwilling to bring in another woman. I'm just waaaaaaaaaaay to possessive for that.

Sigh. I didn't enjoy being 20 enough when I was 20.
Parent - By reebs (chicken whisperer) Date 2006-07-07 11:53 AM
you could watch porn that includes this fantasy, then play it out without the other person.

I didn't enjoy being 20 enough when I was 20.
:laugh: me either!!
Parent - - By squirrelgirl (Indian Buffet Queen) Date 2006-07-07 12:05 PM
I swear I was thinking of asking this sort of question. I'm way more adventurous than my bf. He gets jealous of dildos. :meh: Won't watch any porn with me b/c he gets embarrassed when I'm trying to figure out what really turns him on (beyond what I already know).
I know he's never go for threesomes and I'm not sure that I would either these days.

No one enjoys 20 like they should!!
Parent - By ellapritch [us] Date 2006-07-07 12:50 PM
there's a reason why they say "youth is wasted on the young" : pbbt: So true. sigh. :laugh:
Parent - - By littlemary [us] Date 2006-07-07 2:36 PM
they arent all that great..:wink:
Parent - - By squirrelgirl (Indian Buffet Queen) Date 2006-07-07 2:54 PM
:laugh:
Parent - By littlemary [us] Date 2006-07-07 2:55 PM
:blush:
Parent - - By Arimathea [us] Date 2006-07-07 12:11 PM
Check the dailies.  The domain name change seems to have been the key.  Woo hoo!

I agree.  I really regret not having taken a number of opportunities when I was in my early 20's.  Where are those men now?  (Yeah, I know.  Married and/or fat and out of shape.)
Parent - By reebs (chicken whisperer) Date 2006-07-07 12:20 PM
I always figured, when I'm in my 50's (which I know you aren't, Tessa) if I'm single, I'm going to take a lover in his 20's. Just call me Mrs. Robinson.:cool:
Parent - By kerbear [us] Date 2006-07-07 11:54 AM
Bring it up openly and hoestly and ask for his equally open and hoest feelings about it - if there is any hesitation AT ALL, I mean even just a little bit - drop it like it's hot. Who knows, maybe this is a secret fantasy he's had for a while and hasn't been motivated to bring it up! But seriously - if isn't something he doesn't want to do, avoid the Zen master techniques and just respect his feelings because while such things can be verrrrry fun (*whistles innocently*) when both people are totally on board and comfortable and excited for it, if one party is at all uncomfortable and/or feels coerced into it, it can be verrrrry damaging.

Is he aware of this part of your sexual history and if so, what has his reaction been to such stories? That can be telling as to how he feels about the subject.
Parent - - By stormcatcher (celebrate with me) Date 2006-07-07 12:38 PM
Um, I'm an elitist. No way would I bag a 33 year old guy running 23:26 of 5k. Too slow.
Parent - By dangerousdan (bear terrorist) [us] Date 2006-07-07 12:44 PM
:laugh::laugh::laugh:
Parent - - By gohawki [us] Date 2006-07-07 12:45 PM
AAAHAHAHAHAHA!  So, what's the cutoff??
Parent - - By dangerousdan (bear terrorist) [us] Date 2006-07-07 12:48 PM
I'm betting for men she requires sub 17:00 MINIMUM
Parent - - By stormcatcher (celebrate with me) Date 2006-07-07 12:49 PM
Most of my women friends have run sub 17.
Parent - - By dangerousdan (bear terrorist) [us] Date 2006-07-07 12:51 PM
Well you should have sex with them then : pbbt:
Parent - By stormcatcher (celebrate with me) Date 2006-07-07 12:53 PM
Don't tempt me. :wink:
Parent - - By stormcatcher (celebrate with me) Date 2006-07-07 12:49 PM
Um, my 31 year old husband has a PR of 13:37. He'd have to at least be under 14:30.
Parent - - By dangerousdan (bear terrorist) [us] Date 2006-07-07 12:52 PM
How about sub 17:00 AND treats you like the Goddess you are :hug:: pbbt:  Would you settle :wtf::mischief:
Parent - By stormcatcher (celebrate with me) Date 2006-07-07 12:53 PM
He'd have to be pretty hot. An accent would definitely help. :laugh:
Parent - - By Arimathea [us] Date 2006-07-07 1:09 PM
Er -- there's such a thing as TOO fast, if you get my meaning.:laugh:
Parent - - By stormcatcher (celebrate with me) Date 2006-07-07 3:59 PM
Yeah. There is. The minute men. :meh:
Parent - By dangerousdan (bear terrorist) [us] Date 2006-07-08 2:27 PM
:laugh::laugh::laugh:
Parent - By squirrelgirl (Indian Buffet Queen) Date 2006-07-07 1:05 PM
Yeah, that's my pace. :laugh:
Parent - - By dangerousdan (bear terrorist) [us] Date 2006-07-07 12:46 PM
How do you know DH wouldn't be interested?  He might be???  Just ask???  Can't hurt.

I've always thought that could be fun but the problem is I'm kinda picky and it would have to be the right third person.  And it seems like there would be logistical issues.  Like, I wouldn't want to cuddle afterwards with two people.  It would seem a little weird to be like "ok other person leave!"  -- or do you make pancakes for him/her in the morning :wtf:
Parent - By squirrelgirl (Indian Buffet Queen) Date 2006-07-07 2:54 PM
I wonder about those kind of details too.
Parent - By Pencils [us] Date 2006-07-08 12:31 PM
I think that most things are fine within a relationship as long as the other person is seriously willing to try.  There are times that you could talk someone, or bully them, into doing something they really don't want to do, and that could be a big mistake.  Other than that, have fun, I think.  Except for threesomes.  That's something I think is generally a bad idea.  If you're a tight twosome, bringing in a third could be real trouble.  You might think it will be OK if you're there, but what if you're suddenly overcome with jealousy when you see your DH kissing someone else?  Or doing something worse?  Don't open that can of worms.  You guys seem so much in love.  :hug::hug:
Parent - - By reebs (chicken whisperer) Date 2006-07-07 11:52 AM
we had port and dessert in bed by candle light last night.  it was magnificent. sweet, quiet time together. :hug::hug::hug:
Parent - By kerbear [us] Date 2006-07-07 11:57 AM
Very romantic! :grin::hug:
Parent - - By Samantha Date 2006-07-07 12:44 PM
I swear, someday I'm actually going to be able to participate in this thread...
:meh::mischief::evil:
Parent - - By Arimathea [us] Date 2006-07-07 1:02 PM
Me too.  Maybe we should start an "involuntarily celibate and thoroughly pissed off about it" thread?
Parent - By Samantha Date 2006-07-07 5:36 PM
Most excellent idea. :meh:
Parent - - By dangerousdan (bear terrorist) [us] Date 2006-07-07 12:48 PM
I had a really weird dream last night.  It started off as a very steamy dream -- involving someone else :shocker!:  But then in my dream I was busted by DH and I felt really horrible and woke up really frantic and upset.  I was relieved that it was only dream :shocker!:

OK so this isn't a fun post but it's sex related :blush:
Parent - - By MetalChick Date 2006-07-07 12:58 PM
I had a weird sex dream last night too...involving one of DH's band members. Who I am not attracted to in the least. I think I might be embarrassed the next time I see him, though. :laugh:
Parent - By kerbear [us] Date 2006-07-07 1:23 PM
Isn't that weird? I had a sex dream about my boss' WIFE recently who I'm totally not attracted to. WTF? And yeah, I actually blushed when I saw him the next day :laugh:
Parent - By littlemary [us] Date 2006-07-07 2:38 PM
i have had that too, waking up really panicky....yuck.:sad:
Parent - - By cinnamongirl [us] Date 2006-07-07 12:52 PM
This needs to get WAY racier. I have had no boy in a while (except one night with the wierd boy, but that doesn't count) and I suspect its the high milage but I was thinking on my way into work today that I haven't played by myself in weeks... This makes me sad. And I will be at the family house this weekend with my roommate and family, so thats not a lot of private time, period next week... This is so depressing!

Samantha, some day we're BOTH going to be able to participate!:cry:
Parent - - By kerbear [us] Date 2006-07-07 1:07 PM
Shower time is (usually) private :wink:
Parent - - By Nini [us] Date 2006-07-07 1:38 PM
I second this!  Shower time is alone time unless you're with someone you want to be playing with :evil:
Parent - By cinnamongirl [us] Date 2006-07-07 2:07 PM
you guys, how sad is it that I didn't think of that on my own... I guess its been a while...:evil::cry::cry:
Parent - By Samantha Date 2006-07-07 5:39 PM
CG, I sure as hell hope you're right. And the sooner the better! :laugh::meh:
Parent - - By MetalChick Date 2006-07-07 12:57 PM
Not to make you feel bad during your lonely 9-day week, Bunny, but I would just like to say that in spite of all the painting DH and I did over the long weekend, DH and I had sex no less than 6 times.:cool: I think DH and I are going through some kind of mid-life horniness.: pbbt:
Parent - - By reebs (chicken whisperer) Date 2006-07-07 1:09 PM
Wow!!  That' s awesome.  My "record" was 5 in one 24 hour period.  But that was back when I was dating that really fit soldier.:evil:
Parent - - By MetalChick Date 2006-07-07 2:06 PM
Damn, reebs. I bow to you. :evil:
Parent - By reebs (chicken whisperer) Date 2006-07-07 4:11 PM
I think it's more impressive on his side than mine.  But yeah, that was a good weekend. :grin:
Parent - By ellapritch [us] Date 2006-07-07 1:17 PM
good lord, sista. Color me jealous. Good for you, though! :grin::laugh:
Parent - By Samantha Date 2006-07-07 5:38 PM
I am so frickin' envious... :cry:
Parent - - By swandive [us] Date 2006-07-07 6:06 PM
My record is 9x in 3 days. :cool:

Oh, and I also have a record of 19 days in a row. :evil:
Parent - - By MetalChick Date 2006-07-07 6:15 PM
9 times in 3 days? Clearly, DH and I have got some work to do. :meh:

I once did 21 days in a row. :evil:
Parent - By swandive [us] Date 2006-07-07 6:18 PM
Three times a day really doesn't seem like that much when you're on vacation. :hug:

And it was his fault, not mine, that the streak ended after 19 days.
Parent - - By nhwarrior [us] Date 2006-07-07 2:01 PM
Alright I have a question, my DH has complained in the past about not having sex often enough, so I've tried to start increasing the amount of time I am "in the mood" and now he doesn't react or seem to want it as often as I try to initiate it.  Should I be pissed, or just stop initiating or what? (Of course it stinks to have sex at the moment because I am 9 mos preggo - can you say fat and awkward but still I try...)
Parent - By dangerousdan (bear terrorist) [us] Date 2006-07-07 2:04 PM
:sad:

Honestly, I would just try talking to him about it so you're clear on what he wants and he knows how you feel.
Parent - - By donnybrook [us] Date 2006-07-07 2:05 PM
Is it possible that he doesn't realize you are trying to initiate?  Men are not subtle creatures.
Parent - By nhwarrior [us] Date 2006-07-07 2:15 PM
Umm, doubtful (read stroking him through his pants tryng to get a reaction...)
Parent - - By Arimathea [us] Date 2006-07-07 2:07 PM
Maybe he's worried about having sex because you are 9 months pregnant?  (Try lying on your side with him behind you, spoon fashion.)

Telling him is probably the best thing -- he may be unsure if he's reading your cues correctly because he can't believe that at this stage you are still interested.

You might also remind him that there will be a six week drought and you want to store up some beforehand!
Parent - By nhwarrior [us] Date 2006-07-07 2:14 PM
That is so funny about the drought cause that is part of my rationale too!  This is baby #2 and the first time back from #1 was NOT fun (can you say I didn't know that I was sensitive to Astroglide in addition to being out of commision for 6 wks!)

And spoon is the only way we've been able to do it for months!

I guess I will just talk to him.  I really hate to have to "schedule" it but...that is better than my getting pissed every time I get pushed away.
Parent - - By fivelette [us] Date 2006-07-07 3:47 PM
Here's my current situation. I recently started hooking up with a guy who just got  back from the US track olympic something or others.... Needless to say, he's in shape.

So we hook up, he's a freaky bastard. I mean....I'm freaky....but this kid is nuts. Anyways....this is the best situation I could have gotten myself into. He just kisses me, gives me incredible oral....and  then cuddles with me. He'll call me up at random times and say, "Hey,  I'm coming over....." and viola, Marcy gets oral, and then cuddles. Score!

Life is pretty friggin good.
Parent - - By swandive [us] Date 2006-07-07 4:29 PM
Not fair!  This guy doesn't happen to have clones around the US, does he?  There's about half a dozen of us on this thread who could use his services. :laugh:
Parent - - By fivelette [us] Date 2006-07-07 4:44 PM
I really stepped in shit on this one. He just magically appears, even at 6am! Ha! Then, I don't have to talk to him, he's not the jealous type, he just likes giving oral. It's nothing but compliments and cuddling afterwards, and then I send him on his merry way. AND HE'S REALLY REALLY GOOD AT IT! : pbbt:

If I were really evil, I'd post his myspace link so you can check out how cute  he is too.....:evil: let me have a couple more martinis before I blow his cover.
Parent - - By stormcatcher (celebrate with me) Date 2006-07-07 6:03 PM
I'm just hoping he isn't someone I know. With the hubby in pro running, I know many of those guys.
Parent - - By swandive [us] Date 2006-07-07 6:05 PM
Hey, this is a guy who might be fast enough for you. :evil:
Parent - - By stormcatcher (celebrate with me) Date 2006-07-07 6:07 PM
I'm really going to have a fun time with this if he is someone I know or my husband knows. Geez. Maybe he could give my husband some tips or something. :meh:
Parent - - By swandive [us] Date 2006-07-07 6:07 PM
Damn straight!  I think there are lots of guys who could use lessons from this boy.
Parent - By stormcatcher (celebrate with me) Date 2006-07-07 6:08 PM
No doubt. All talk, no action.
Parent - - By fivelette [us] Date 2006-07-07 6:10 PM
He's not a runner, he throw shot put, I guess that's what it's called. He was at the races last week though.
Parent - By stormcatcher (celebrate with me) Date 2006-07-07 6:12 PM
Thank god.
Up Topic Communities / Women / Getting Freaky on Friday -- the Sex thread

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